I have been recently following Super singer and kicked myself for not having done that much earlier. The latest episode particularly was great. It ahd emotions as its theme and all the contestants were pretty cool. But my pick was this guy called Prasanna. He rocked the stage.

His rendition of "Vazhve Mayam" nearly brought tears to my eyes. Very close to Yesudas's original. Absolutely Brilliant. I have been listening to that song since evening.

At the risk of being repetitious, he was brilliant!

The video is here

State of mind is a rather befuddling one, at least it has always been for me. My mood swings from very enthusiastic to down in the dumps back to marginally enthusiastic if not ecstatic. And those moments of down in the dumps invokes this persona of me which has too many questions and unfortunately does not have a Jeeves to answer all the questions.

These moments confuse me, I don't know what to do and the fact that I don't have a plan scares me. I hate moments of waiting for something/anything. Cause waiting makes me restless and makes my idle mind wander and it never finds what it wants. It brings out all my insecurities and makes them so tangible that I can almost smell it.That scares the living daylights out of me. It really does.

The funny thing about all this is that somewhere deep down I also know that things might not turnout like these insecurities demon portray them to be. There is a good possibility that these demons would be scared away by the kindness of reality. At least thats what I hope.

Hoping that hope doesnt give up hope on me!

P.S : It should not take a genius to figure out that this was written when i was in dumps!

The Road goes ever on and on
Down from the door where it began.
Now far ahead the Road has gone,
And I must follow, if I can,
Pursuing it with eager feet,
Until it joins some larger way
Where many paths and errands meet.
And whither then? I cannot say.

From lord of the rings. I somehow think this makes too much sense right now.
Maybe its the lack of sleep due to finals, maybe its not.

If you are what your choices are, how do we explain certain things. There are certain things of my past that I have conveniently forgotten and to such an extent that it does not even bother me anymore. Not an irk, Nothing! Zilch. And that bothers me at times. Does the fact that some things of the past does not affect in any way say anything about me? Does it mean I am shallow or that I did not respect, cherish the certain events of the past.

I don't know and it often pops up as a question! I always brush it aside telling myself that , thats what they call "Moving on". And its a good thing aint it? I am happy, its not that I keep worrying, but does the fact that I am happy and am not affected at all mean something? Is it bad? Am i Chandler??